A Sentence About Every Tales Game Released in the US

In honor of the Tales of the Abyss 3DS release in the US, here is a sentence about every Tales game that’s come out over here (ordered by release date).

Tales of Destiny – Talking swords but no personality.

Tales of Eternia – Save two worlds in one game but don’t fight Maxwell too early like I did.

Tales of Symphonia – Exspheres created by not very nice angels turn people into monsters.

Tales of Legendia – Botched Namco release in the US, surprise!

Tales of Phantasia – Battle system feels a bit stiff these days.

Tales of the Abyss – Best battle system, best story, best Tales game.

Tales of the World: Radiant Mythology – Why not just release Tales of Rebirth in North America, you jerks?

Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World – I’ll play it some day.

Tales of Vesperia – Any game with a pipe smoking dog in your party has got to be good.